February 2006
14 posts
Going Away For A Bit
Hello, I’ll be taking a internet break for a week or two during which time I’ll be overseas. Also, this site needs to switch servers and may be down for a few days. I know, I know, tragic. But I’m sure all seven of you will get by. Thanks
-Street
Ouch
While play fighting at work today David Cho kneed me in the face. It hurt a lot and now my beautiful face is no longer perfect. Look at the evidence below and see what the evil hand of David Cho hath wrought.
More Fun With History
Let’s get our learn on!
Most of us were taught to love our families. However, sometimes that love goes too far…much too far. Take the Habsburg dynasty who ruled much of Europe for most of the last millennium. They practiced the divinely southern art of marrying their cousins when possible and, in the end, paid the price for it. Their centuries of rampant inbreeding led to the...
New T-Shirt
T-Shirt number four is in and up on BustedTees. Like forced marches and forced labor, this T-Shirt bemoans a forced friend, MySpace’s Tom. Simply put, Tom is NOT my friend. Please, won’t you buy one? Click the Pic
ElleGirl
As part of the publicity for the upcoming CollegeHumor Guide to College, a bunch of us went over to to ElleGirl and were made pretty by their hair, makeup and wardrobe people. Watch the magic unfold and see the amazing result. Picking out an outfit with Jeff like two un-gay guys do everyday. In the makeup chair where I realized the following things: I have serious eye bags, getting powder...
Me 2.0
I often spend my nights lying awake wondering how much better the world would be if there were more than one of me. I always assumed it would be impossible to make another me - another funny, adorable, kind and caring me - but the good people over at CrazyClone have it figured out. Taking their advice I have cloned myself and now know what it would be like to have multiple me’s and, sadly,...
Conundrum
Have you ever wondered why so many people get hit by cars in New York? Here’s a clue…
Ok, I guess I’ll just walk…or maybe not…or, should I?
Question of the Day
So, in the song “Winter Wonderland” the verse claims that “Gone away is the Bluebird, here to stay is a new bird.” But what is the new bird that is here to stay? As far as I know there are no reverse-migrating birds and there certainly aren’t any birds I associate with winter. Anyone?
New Column Out
I Have a new column out at CollegeHumor called ‘Being a Man in Winter.’ Here’s a bit.
There is no doubt that many of you are men – after all, look at the pictures we put up. And there is also no doubt that men will do just about anything to appear strong, confident, sensitive and most of all, powerful. All of these traits are inherent to manliness: that sweet sense of...
Bummer
Man, he must have hit some hard times, what with selling computer software over the internet and all.
Here’s a hint to spammers: you’d probably get through to more people if you didn’t send your garbage under the name of someone who isn’t famous enough to have been on The Simpsons.
Stoner Songs
Anyone who has ever met a stoner knows that they love the number 420. I’ve heard a rumor that the significance of that number and that time (4:20) comes from the police code for marijuana. That I cannot confirm but what I can do is this: list off all the iTunes songs on the CollegeHumor network which play for exactly four minutes and twenty seconds. Now, just sit back, read the list and...
A Poem
I wrote this poem for the CH Guide to College but it was cut during the first pass. I really like it so I’ve decided to post it here.
If a ‘Boot’ is a trunk, and a ‘Fag’ is a smoke
While a fag is a ‘Poof’ and guy is a ‘Bloke’
If you’re ‘Pissed’ when you’re drunk and you’re drunk everyday
You must be in...
Flonase
Who created this miracle drug? What divine being bestowed such a wonderful product on the world? I often wish it was over-the-counter so I could buy hundreds of gallons of it and spend my days on a chaise lounge pumping the sweet mist into my nostrils. But alas it is by prescription only and I must therefore remain in a constant state of sinus infection to get my hands on it. Oh, Flonase, why...
Law and Order
After lunch today I spotted a huge black escalade with tinted-out windows parked in front of our office. I’m used to seeing cars like that since there are a lot of government (FBI, Imigration, municipal) offices right near ours. Most of the cop/government cars parked around here put a little sign in the window letting the meter maids know that their car is a government vehicle. However,...